Hey you!

Come on in!

Pull up a chair. Well, maybe not that one. I need to get rid of that one! wink

That one.

Yeah. The good chair.

Okay, can I just say that I’m glad you’re here? Because I am.

What can I get for you? Coffee? Sweet tea? Glass of wine? Something stronger? I’m not judging. 😊

Give me a little time, and I’ll know your order! Meanwhile, help yourself.

Anyhoo …

Before I interrupted myself, I was saying I was glad you stopped by. It’s been a lot of years that I’ve been thinking about Relative Choice by myself. Why I needed it. What it would be. How it would look and act. How others might need it like I did. How it could help.

(Cause we both know I needed A LOT of help. cackles good-naturedly)

It’s not like I didn’t know I was different or that I didn’t fit in when I was growing up – even in my own family. I assure you, I knew.

You too? Yeah, I think we ALL knew, right?

Thing is, we didn’t talk about this stuff back then. And don’t let anyone with salt and pepper hair sugarcoat what “back then” was! This BS about people on social media today wanting to show the world only a perfect facade? Yeah, that didn’t start with Facebook, Honey Bunny. That started all the way back when the rules said we didn’t air our family’s dirty laundry in public.

Nope! We were supposed to show the world a family that for many of us didn’t exist.

Here, let me top off your cup. 🙂

No more, my friend. Absofreakinglutely. NO. MORE.

I started trying to find people who felt like me. Tried to find the spot where “they” were. Took me a while to learn that I was looking in the wrong places. Looking for something that didn’t yet exist. Churches were meant for worship. The job was there to earn a paycheck. The gym was there for a workout. The library was there for books, the . . . 

There was simply no place to go to find what I was looking for. What?! I was supposed to tap on the gal in front of me at the supermarket and ask if she was looking for a sister?? Really??

I wanted a direct path to creating the family I didn’t have, and I figured I probably wasn’t the only one.

I decided to build Relative Choice myself.

Really, all I’ve ever wanted is a place where people like us could just… find each other. Not to date or network. Just to belong somewhere.

Somewhere you could celebrate your birthday with people who actually remembered. Ask for a hug after a rotten day. Watch a terrible movie together, or scream at the TV because the darned ref is blind – I mean, everyone knows it!! – and your team just blew a perfectly good lead!! 

Where you could share a recipe. Show off your new puppy. Get everybody’s opinion before a first date. Celebrate a promotion. Mourn a loss. Look at those vacation photos. Laugh until your stomach hurts. 

Sit in silence when that’s all you’ve got.

Just… live. life. together.

That’s the part so many of us are missing.

I got tired of waiting for someone else to create what I needed. What maybe, just maybe, you need.

So I’m trying to co-create it. With people like you. 

Maybe I’m wrong.

But I have a feeling it’s going to be a really special place. 🙂

And that’s all I gotta say about that for the time being. If you want to know more about our story, head to RelativeChoice.com for more information.

As for me? What I am interested in is YOUR story. Her story. His story. Their story.

Because boy oh boy, do we have stories.

So many stories!

Estrangement, death, geographic separation, life changes, drift, addiction, mental health, annnnnnnnnnnnddddddd . . .

Millions of us. With. Our. Stories.

In short, (Mrs. Sorkin, my junior high English teacher, is probably rolling her eyes right now. Sorry, Mrs. Sorkin.) IN SHORT, the goal of this blog is for us to tell those stories. For us to start the discussion that, until now, has been something filled with shame, embarrassment, guilt, and a hole (misspelling intended) bunch of other nonsense. It’s to feel seen and heard AND, maybe, just maybe, put us onto the path of creating a family that actually works for us.

Lawd, that was A LOT. I’m gonna pour ME a glass now!! And I don’t even drink!!

That’s too many stories for me to write. It’s not that I mind talking. Truth told, I’m not sure I’ve ever used a sentence where a paragraph will do. LOL. At the same time, I can barely speak for myself. I certainly won’t try to speak for you.

Aren’t you just a lil freakin’ tired of people speaking for YOU?

raises glass

Here’s to ya!

So know that I’m bringing on a team of folks who are interested in our mission. They get it. They’ve lived it.

Now, have they lived your exact story? Maybe, but probably not. More than likely, though, their story will remind you of yours in some way, shape or form. And that’s what’s important – well, at least for me. I want to be someplace where people try to see and understand me. And if that’s what you want, I want that for you as well.

I think of them like extended cousins. They’re gonna come and spill the tea every week from their perspective.

I’ll be here from time to time. We’ll have guest bloggers visit as well. You can never have enough cousins, right?

Right.

Well, the good ones. Not the ones you’re thinking about. wink

The ones who care. Who see you. Who want to welcome you home.

That’s several hundred words to say what I’ve been trying to say all along. (Sorry, Mrs. Sorkin!!)

Welcome home, my friend.

All of us hope you feel comfortable here. And, if you don’t, we hope you speak the hell up!! We don’t just want you reading along. We want you to be part of this community we’re building.

Because, someday, we want to look back and see we didn’t create a blog.

We created an extended family.

Hug yourself for me. That is, if you do that sort of thing. Otherwise, just accept this smile I’m sending.

Till next time.